Life sucked. Awfully sucked. That's what Lisa had been telling herself ever since her mother left. Since the funeral began until it ended, Lisa had been dead silent. When it was over, she plugged in her earphones and left just like that. She didn't even cry on that day. That's when she started locking herself up, or finding her peace of mind, as she had described it. She hated how her Dad never understood her. He used to be the best father any girl could ever ask for. But ever since she died, it was as if Dad died too. She no longer knew Paul Harrods now. The Paul she knew was understanding, always had time for the children and loved them more than anything else in the world. But now, all she saw was a stranger living in the house.
She'd tried encouraging herself to go to the living room and continue life just like she used to, but she couldn't just suddenly do it, right? Paul would surely tease her and give her an endless speech about how she was so spoiled and not acting like an adult, and other stuff. She could already imagine it. "Lisa, you're a grown-up, and you know that. You have two little siblings under you, and you're not showing your responsibility as the eldest sister. You're not the only one who loss a mother here, they did too! You should be ashamed of yourself..bla, bla, bla.." She let her mind relax. She wouldn't dare think what else he would say. That's why, she was determined to stay in her room until Paul decided to leave. She couldn't stand his presence anymore, not with his current self.
She changed her position from lying facing the ceiling to sitting facing the window. She kinda missed outside, a lot, actually. But her ego put her in a firm condition, and she's not relenting. From inside, she could see James and Vicky peering through the window to have a sneak-peak on their sister. Of course Lisa missed them. She missed them more than anything, but never more than her mother. She smiled to them, who thought she didn't notice them peeking from the window. James tried to run, but Vicky was genuinely stuck. She won't release the window, and James knew it was no use once Vicky won't let go of something. So they stayed until Lisa opened up the window and let the kids in.
"What were you doing out there, you little sweethearts?" Vicky was already messing around with the stereo. She abruptly changed channels, but they knew she couldn't be bothered. She laughed in entertainment.
"Lisa, you haven't come for dinner for a long time. Breakfast too, even lunch! We missed you, you know?" Lisa felt a pang in her heart. That kinda killed her inside a bit. "James, you know I've been busy with homework. I've got a test by the end of the year. A really important one. And I don't wanna mess this one up. Don't worry about my meals. I've been eating plenty in here." She tried encouraging him by giving her one of her sweetest smiles. But it didn't work this time. He'd known her more than that to be fooled.
"Come on, Lisa. How long are you going to avoid Dad? Besides, Vicky needs her big sister in this house."
Another pang. Ouch. How long exactly have she been in here? It does feel a little musty in here. Is it really time to get out? Five months trapped in this room, five months of energy bars from Wal-Mart, and five months of a life without Mum. Five months. A time that felt like an eternity.
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.
"Lisa, are you in there? Er, I mean, of course you're in there. Well, this is really awkward, and we haven't talked for months now, but, it'd be really nice of you to join us for dinner tonight. I missed you, to be honest. It's been really lonely without seeing your sweet smile, you know? And by the way, have you seen the kids? They were playing outside, but when I checked.."
The door creaked open.
Both of them looked shocked. Lisa couldn't believe her eyes. 5 months without looking at her father. And looked what happened to him. His grey eyes seemed a little bit more sadder than usual. His body looked frail and weak, as if he's been carrying boulders all night. His tanned skin turned to this awfully pale tone. Suddenly, she felt so guilty. Guilty for not being there for him all this time. Guilty for leaving him with all the work in the house. Guilty for locking herself away from the family. She fell to her knees, and wept.
Paul knelt down to reach her. He pushed her chin so she could face her. He'd been blinking away the tears, but now, the dam broke. He too, wept with his daughter. In the end, they cried together under the wall lamp. Any conversation between them broke in an instance, and tears filled their world.
TO BE CONTINUED.
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